Zen In The City: Five Tips to Find It Now
April 13, 2010 by Ilana Arazie
Filed under Featured
I used to be one of those girls who worked from 9 to 7 in a Manhattan cubicle before running from event to event each evening to make what I thought were important connections. I had a harried, on-the-go look 24hours a day. It wasn’t pretty.
It took a few low moments and a lot of anxiety to realize I wasn’t happy (or having too many good hair and skin days for that matter). I’d turned 30 and my life was nothing like I thought it would be. I didn’t have the guy, the apartment, or the dream job. But it took that moment
for me to make some important changes. With some help from authors, friends, and mentors, here’s what I finally discovered.
Happiness Comes from Inside No class, event or person is ever going to make you happy. The order goes like this: Become happy. Then go out into the world and do what you need to do. You see, the high we get from our senses or material possessions lasts about six minutes. Yep that’s it. Then we’re ready for the Next Big Thing. Sounds crazy, but you can find more happiness sitting alone in your apartment than running around. Get still and secure with your life first, then make decisions about what you want and where you want to be.
Focus on What You Have My brain used to run the same script every morning, running through everything I didn’t have in my life. Now I realize that what we focus on is exactly what we get. The more I thought about not having love or a dream job, the more stuck I got. When I started waking up with gratitude for everything I did have in my life, more of that grew.
Meditation is Better than Medication I never thought I could sit still for more than 2 minutes, but a fun trip to India changed my ways. We meditated every morning for about an hour before practicing yoga. I learned that stillness is what connects you to your true self. It’s your spirit that has all the answers you need and lets you see things clearly. There are a few mediation spots in New York City I love. Meditation is the best elixir. It calms and centers me, and draws the coolest parts of me out.
Finding Love Starts with You Every guy I dated was a mirror to where I was at in my own life. If a guy didn’t call or blew me off, I might have been playing his same game without realizing it. No one is ever going to love you more than you love yourself. So when I wasn’t getting the love I wanted, I turned up the heat at home. I gave myself the love I wanted; and like magic, better-quality and more available men showed up.
Watch What You Tell Yourself Every thought and word you say has power. That New York cynic in you criticizing every situation just created his or her destiny. What we see and what we believe is exactly what we get in life. Even if you have to convince yourself, think positive thoughts and make wishful statements.Using positive affirmations is the best trick.
Living in busy and anxious New York isn’t always a walk in Central Park. But by looking inward and changing some of your habits and thoughts, it’s possible to live your dream life in the city. No to-do or check list needed!
Photo: Flickr
About our contributor:
Ilana Donna Arazie is a blogger and vlogger based in NYC who chronicles stories about living your best life in a big city. Her stories have been featured on the Associated Press, Chicago-Sun Times, Yahoo, The Travel Channel and other media outlets. She is the founder of Downtown Dharma.com , a site that is a bit of Cosmo meets Deepak Chopra, offering deep yet fun insights into finding peace and meaning.
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